What we teach our children vs. what they go to school and hear/see. I’m telling you it is something crazy. We teach our children to respect their peers, adults, and authority. To be honest, to be kind,to be responsible, to be leaders and not followers, to protect themselves. We teach them to respect each others space, not to allow any one in their personal space, not to use foul language. To walk away when they see a situation getting out of hand. Mind their own business, not to be the instigator. We teach them what is inappropriate, and to not allow NOBODY to touch them in an inappropriate manner. We teach all of these important principles for them to go to school, and be exposed to something totally different. No, our kids are not perfect, and we should not expect them to be-but all we can do is pray they stay on the right track.
As parents we must understand what we teach our children at home- does not mean other parents are implementing the same teachings. So many children grow up in all different types of environments, and experience unfortunate situations at young ages. Some learn from this behavior, and want to break the cycle…other’s act out on it and emulate this behavior at school. We can’t protect our children from everything , and we can’t shelter them either (even though it would be nice to lock them up in a bubble until they are adults) haha! But our children wouldn’t know how to function. And that’s just not fair… Instead, we must continue to instill in our children these important principles. Making sure we explain there are consequences behind anything you do- good or bad. Praying that when our children see something different than what they are taught at home, they will reference back to our teachings-as children and adults. My Mother always told me and my brother-“you have to listen to somebody, whether it’s me, a teacher, an employer, a judge” , etc. Being a parent is by far the toughest job in the world! It’s definitely a blessing, and a privilege, but challenging.
Our children have to understand how important it is to be your own person. Be able to think for yourself. Not to repeat what you hear or see- especially when you have no idea what you are saying or what you are about to get yourself into.
TRUE STORY: My boys came home from school the other day… we go through the usual everyday questions..How was school? How was lunch? Do you have homework? etc. Here is how the conversation went…
CJ: (the middle child): Mommy, all I have for homework is for you to sign my permission slip for my field trip.
Me: (THE MOTHER) : Great! when is your field trip? Where are you going?
CJ: Next week! We are going to the park.
DaViaughn (the older brother) : “YOU LUCKY BASTARD” (as he so casually gets his drink out of the refrigerator)
Me: WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?? (as my head spins around like the exorcist)
OMG….I JUST COULD NOT BELIEVE MY EARS YOU GUYS….. my mouth wide open and my eyes as big as a cow’s butt! haha (in my sons words) I was shocked because we don’t use the word BASTARD in this house. I went on to ask my son where did he hear this word from. My son told me he heard some kid saying it at school. I began to tell him what the word BASTARD meant, and that it’s pretty much a curse word, and it is inappropriate. Man, the look on his face was PRICELESS! I invited him to come ask me if he is ever unsure of what something means, to just come ask me. I painted a picture for him….say he (being my son) used this word at school because he heard his friend say it… If a teacher was around and heard him, he would have been the one in trouble for using a word he had no idea was inappropriate. And I am sure the other child that said it would have been no where to be found, and no one would have heard him say it… BOOM! That’s just how it works! I explained to him this is a prime example of how not to follow behind what someone else is doing. Side note: after our talk I definitely ran and locked myself in the closet to LAUGH and called my husband) I mean this thang was shocking and funny all at the same time-you know the “kids say the darnest thing” term? This was definitely that moment. But I surely could not allow my son to see me laughing…NOT COOL. In this house we have an open door policy- I want my children to talk to us about any and everything – any questions they may have no matter how uncomfortable it may be. We as parents are our children’s first teachers, and I think it’s best they hear from us first.
Thanks for reading!
Posted by: A Mom in total shock!
Ivy-